I am now so used to natto that I I am jaded to its visage.  Does one more photo of natto evoke its stickiness further? Just like 3 days of hiking through primeval forests, no thank you, I have ceased to care about epic, thousand year old trees covered in moss. They are common place now.  And natto slime is no different.

The final full week of natto consumption (can you believe it’s been nearly a month already?) yielded a few interesting discoveries.  Chief among them is that natto is among the “Swiss Army Knife” categorization of foodstuffs. Not in that it can be prepared in so many ways, or that it contains a corkscrew, but in that it is just so useful at so many times of the day.

Natto is Awesome at the Following Times:

It’s great in the morning, when you have zero time because you were up too late watching South Korea/America/Mexico/England, or any of the other soccer teams you care about fail to succeed. You can make it in seconds, and it’s got good staying power combined with a piece of fruit or something, so you don’t start feeling hungry again until right around noon.

It’s wonderful when you get home from work, and have an awkward little window where normally I would either end up eating dinner early either because I spent the day throwing little kids around and have worked up an appetite. Or more likely it’s because of prolonged exposure to an island on which half the population is has cleared the half-century mark, which means I am basically a senior citizen by osmosis, and thus my body recognizes that 4:30 is the perfect time to have dinner. Natto to the rescue.  A pack of natto is only about 40 grams of food, which is enough to fill the void until I can eat at a reasonable time, rather than hate myself at around 9:30 when I got hungry again on an earlier schedule.

Natto is also nice for a little something pre-workout if I’m feeling a little draggy. If I only eat a banana or something I die about half way through, but with some protein mixed in (and all the natto slime superpowers) I can keep genki-ly throwing my ball of metal with a handle on it around well into the evening.

Natto is Incredibly NOT Awesome at the Following Times:

Natto is the last thing you should ever try to eat if you’ve got any kind of nausea.  Even though I’m used to the stuff, there is nothing like slimy beans to really bring that feeling of nausea to the forefront.  Unless you find slimy things soothing for some reason, probably best not to test this one.  I have already thrown myself in front of the bullet of progress for you on this one, and you may consider yourself honored to know such a hero and patriot, one that would suffer so that you need not.

I also find that post-workout natto loses some of it’s appeal for some reason. I think the general loss of appetite that comes with working hard + aforementioned slimy oddness is just enough to remove it as a viable post-workout protein source.  Go eat a dead animal, or some other form of legume instead.

Home Stretch

I’m almost done with 30 days, as of today I should be at 28ish, minus the one off day.  I’m calling it mission success this Wednesday, and I’ll be back some time this week for my final thoughts on the whole gruesome experiment.

I’ve got some other things in the works right now which I started about a week ago which I should also be going live with some time soon, so keep your ears pricked and your eyes glossy and any other marginally old-timey body-alertness related metaphors you can think of.  I’m going to go watch Japan decide whether my tomorrow is full of bright, perky, patriotic co-workers, or bitter, angry, sarcastic hate-balls.  たのしみ～(/^ ^)/|  o |

Day 8: Karashi and soy

Went out with some guys from the shamisen group tonight after practice, so I didn’t get home till 11:45 or so.  I decided to take it as a challenge to see just how quickly I could eat the natto. Two or three minutes later, I was staring at an empty natto pack and a fairly unexpected result.

Now it might just be the new brand of natto I’m trying out, a lovely Kyushu local variety, but tonight’s shot of beanie goodness was…good?  Either this brand just tastes more like beans, or I’ve gotten so used to the slimy and bitter parts of natto that I’m starting to notice the other flavors that have always been there.  It’s encouraging.

Day 9: Strangely sweet dressing, prepackaged with new brand

A friend was over and I explained my perverse desire to get used to natto. His favorite preparation was with soy sauce, and nothing else added, which might explain why he also said that the dressing that comes with this new stuff would be good. To be fair, it wasn’t bad, but man was it ever sweet.

Also I apparently still look like I am going to die while eating natto. My subconscious is still grimacing.

Day 10: Soy, mustard

Another shot of the late night natto, but I think I’m pretty well used to the stuff by now, so I can start adding it in in the morning and seeing how it holds up.  Japanese TV is apparently on my side on this one, as there was a feature about how natto with cheese is apparently famous in some prefecture or another. Tomorrow perhaps?  They also made natto cheese toast, which I think is also worth a shot. It seems strangely palatable…

Day 11: The usual fare

Natto is officially a viable breakfast food.  I have so many people I need to thank.

Also if you will turn your attention to the rear-right you will see the first of the island passion fruit which is just coming into season, served with some yogurt.  Ah, the perks of island life.

Day 12: Oh no!

So I went out diving with an English teacher from the next island over who is occasional forced to fly to Kikai and teach, and spent the whole day underwater, sightseeing, and eating wild boar feet (complete with just a little bit of boar hair, mmmm). I just didn’t want to make the run all the way out to the supermarket that’s still open at 11 at night.  So Day 12 was a natto-free day.

OH NO!!! Is this the end of natto as we know it?  I mean, I have pretty clearly stated that I need to be eating it every day, regardless of circumstances, so by this rubric I just failed and need to go sell all my possessions, retreat into seclusion in a mountain monastery, and spend my days in quiet reflection of just how much of a failure I am.

Well, no. At times like this, it’s important to remember that my actual goal is to get used to natto, not to eat it for 30 days. Eating it for 30 days is just the means I chose to get to this goal.  Short term failure does not equal long term failure. In fact, I would argue quite the opposite: short term failure is often necessary for long term success.  We learn so much more when we fail.  For example, I have learned to buy in bulk. I have also learned it’s better to eat it in the morning if I can, since I should eat some breakfast anyway and it’s an easy time to make sure I get it done.

Day 13: Cheese, parsley

As per the recommendation of a Japanese tv show.  The cheese is pretty much entirely masked by the natto, but the parsley is kind of present.  All in all not one of my favorite ways to eat the stuff.  Mustard and soy is still a heavy favorite.

Day 14: Natto Toast!

Saw this one on the same show which recommended yesterday’s recipe. I honestly don’t get it though. Natto+cheese just tastes like extra slimy natto. Natto plus melted cheese doubly so.  Even the flavor of the toast is hard pressed to shine through all the natto funkitude.  However for those of you who have never seen Japanese bread, there’s a hearty inch-thick slice of it lying under all the goo.

Sliced Japanese bread gives me the general impression that the first people to manufacture such bread in Japan did so with a good deal of guess work.  It’s like a lot of the “western” inspired food over here. Vaguely resembling the original in theory, but uniquely Japanese in reality. If one were to describe them they would both seem to be a thing called “bread”, all the essential descriptors are there, and yet the Japanese version possesses unique qualities that would prevent anyone from mistaking it for the thing on which it is based.

Final Thoughts for the Week

As much fun as I’m sure you’re all having of the blow-by-blow, I think I’m going to write the next 2 weekly updates in summary fashion.  See which way feels better.  Plus there is certainly a point of diminishing returns to “photos of natto slime”. I think you get the point.

I’ve got some other posts I’ve started working on, but the weekly projects keeps the blog present in my tragically disorganized mind. I know reading about natto may not be exactly what you’re looking for if you fall into the “family” section of the readership, or the “friends who do not have an unhealthy obsession with Japan” section of the readership, but stick around. Other things in the works.  Besides, you know you that while you are overtly disgusted you are secretly fascinated.

You want to run out and try it right now.

Day 1:

If the camera work wasn’t too bad, there should be a video of my first run at natto floating around the top of the page somewhere.  Initial thoughts:

Yeah, I could do this for a month.

It was more or less like I remembered it, although as stated repeatedly in the video, the addition of soy sauce and mustard, plus a little green onion really did change the flavor dramatically. The aftertaste and the feeling like your lips are coated in slime for 3-4 hours after eating were the same as always. But then, it wouldn’t be natto if you weren’t still tasting it on your lips 3 hours later.

So why could I eat it relatively nausea free this time, despite there being no real change between now and 2 years ago in Tokyo?

The main difference is that since I am voluntarily going out of my way to eat the stuff this time around, it is infinitely more approachable.  It’s like the difference between volunteering to go first on presentation day, and hiding in the back hoping the class runs out of time before you have to go.  The more you build something up, the scarier it becomes and the harder it is to actually dive in.  So dive in early.  Don’t be natto‘s bitch.  Don’t make it a big thing, and it won’t be.

Day 2:

Immediately after a workout, so my arms are more or less down for the count, and wasn’t in the mood to do anything fancy with the natto. Plain, with the soy and mustard.  I wanted to see if the green onion changed the edibility of it significantly, since yesterday seemed almost too easy. Turns out it’s still pretty…good, isn’t the right word. Turns out it’s still pretty not horrible with just the soy and mustard.

It’s only been 2 days, but I already feel like I’ve overcome a significant hurdle in the natto challenge. I still wouldn’t say I “like” or “want to eat” natto, but I will say that the smell no longer really bothers me, and the taste and general slippery mouth feel are both totally manageable.  If snickering Japanese people put it in front of me I think I could defend my honor.

Tomorrow I’ll give it a shot during it’s traditional breakfast time slot, see if it gets any more or less appetizing when I’m half-asleep and cranky.

Day 3:

Today’s natto bears no special preparation but does bear the distinction of being the first shot of natto eaten during its customary time slot.

A note for future generations: while natto is certainly no more or less edible during the morning, and could easily be part of a balanced and energizing breakfast, I do not recommend eating nothing but natto, and I particularly do not recommend eating nothing but natto in 3 minutes because you are in a rush.  I felt like natto slime was crawling back up into my mouth for the entire first half of my day.  Gross.

Day 4:

Trying a new brand of natto today, with this adorable animated…circle? as a mascot.  It’s also pretty much the cheapest natto available, coming in at an epic 120 yen for 4 packs.

Also trying a way of eating natto recommended by my dive buddy, and quasi-island-father Yoda-san.  He claimed that mixing natto with mayonnaise, drastically reduces both the smell and the sticky, sliminess. He was half right. Guess which:

However, the taste was pretty surprisingly good. It tastes kind of like slimy Camembert, but not as buttery.  I’d be ok eating this on a fairly regular basis, except the mayo certainly takes a chunk out of the “healthiness”.

The quest for the perfect natto preparation continues.

Day 5: Natto with mysterious green sauce

Tried the new natto brand’s condiment tonight, which tastes something like…honestly I don’t know if I can describe it.  It’s definitely Japanese, kind of sweet, vaguely reminiscent of some kind of sea vegetable, and only barely noticeable alongside pungent natto.  Went down pretty easy, and the preparation phase had a lot less of the “poking and prodding to ascertain whether it is indeed food” stage than previous days.

My subconscious is beginning, I believe, to grasp that natto is indeed some kind of food, and that consuming it will not cause me to die in some kind of horrible, sticky, smelly manner.

Note: Post-natto dishes should be taken care of with all due haste, or you will come home to your entire house smelling vaguely like bad feet, good cheese, and day-old bodily secretions. It is every bit as unpleasant as it sounds.

Day 6: Karashi mustard, and soy sauce

Tonight’s natto is brought to you by the letter L, for lazy.  I have an avocado which is sitting in my fridge ready for tomorrow morning’s natto but tonight I made homemade spaghetti sauce and meatballs and wasn’t feeling additionally inspired.

I will say this though, using real karashi and soy sauce rather than the packet which comes with the natto makes for a much tastier product. The mustard is much more pungent and present.

Day 7: Soy sauce, and half an avocado

So.  It turns out that natto has superpowers. Not particularly cool superpowers, but superpowers none the less which really need to be taken into consideration when mixing natto with other, non-sauce substances.

Natto by itself is a sticky, strandy, slimy mess.  Adding sauce adds flavor, but no extra mass worth noting.  The actual physical amount of stuff you have to consume has not increased significantly.  An avocado on the other hand, is quite a bit more mass.  And it turns out that natto + anything causes a horrible chain-reaction in the “anything” which causes it to have the exact same sticky, slimy, strandy-ness as the natto itself.

Natto with avocado is actually pretty good. But there was about 2-3 times as much of it as I’m used to eating.

It’s also worth noting that this superpower does not limit itself to consumables.  Doing the dishes, I learned early on that you do the natto last unless you want to be using strandy natto-soap on the rest of your dishes.

Final Thoughts for the Week

I hope it has been an entertaining first week, and that the photos have not caused you any undue psychological trauma.  It’s honestly not nearly as bad as you might suspect.  So far I myself have been surprised by the general ease with which I have already gotten used to natto. I have not yet reached a point where I am actively desiring natto, but I’m about as willing to eat is as any of the other myriad “it’s good for you but tastes like the inside of a sewer” products available on the market.

Week 2 might see some inclusion in actual meals, natto tempura or natto fried rice, and I still need to tackle natto over plain rice at some point. I intended to do so at some point this week, but an incident involving a bowl of rice, a tray, a thin ledge, and a general failure to understand the laws of physics as they pertain to centers of gravity deprived me of that opportunity.

Always next week.

I also need to do the natto + raw egg one of my students recommended.  I don’t think she was just doing it to mess with me, but then she’s one of the smarter ones so I wouldn’t put it past her entirely.